A girl, just about 12 years old, committed suicide after she failed to receive the exam results she aspired to.
I am sad about that fact, and it throws me back to my own educational style.
What is going on in the head of a little child that tries so hard to meet requirements? The requirements of her own standards, those of the school and those of parents, friends and others around her.
Every semester, one can read how those that excel are celebrated. They deserve it, of course, but what is the kind of message that we are sending out to those that don’t make it?
Is it that we are telling them, that they are not worth it? That their future is ruined? That they are failures? What really goes on in their mind to be able to take this last step and kill yourself?
The outcome of the communication is the result you get – this is one of the NLP belief systems. I turn it around and wonder, if we can say – the outcome of the education are the children you get. Or the society you get.
Does this throw a new perspective to you, the one who is reading this?
I, myself, are sometimes caught up in this bug that is called educational success. It frustrates me when I see the grades of my boy drop from term to term. I sometimes lose patience, despite all that I have learnt about NLP. I am human, but to be human also means that I need to re-consider my own style and develop greater flexibility.
I have to teach my boy to stand on his own feet. To be able to walk his path alone, and without constant pushing. To be able to maintain his motivation and committment to a goal of his. To realise that what we learn today is gone tomorrow and replace by something different, probably better.
I hope that the death of this young girl is a reminder that these kids have feelings or emotions, and a right to their own path they chose.
My heart is with the mourning family!!
Andreas is the founder of Asia Mind Dynamics and a certified trainer of internationally recognised certification programmes:
- Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) with the American Board of Neuro Linguistic Programming (ABNLP),
- NLP Coach Training with the Coaching Division of ABNLP,
- The Words That Change Minds -Language and Behaviour Profile of which he also is one of 17 Global Master Trainers
- Creating Your Future Coaching™ Techniques at the Masters Level with the International Timeline Therapy Association
- Hypnosis with the American Board of Hypnotherapy (ABH)
- Master Trainer with the International Association of Counsellors and Therapists (IACT).
We also train companies to achieve higher performance especially through our signature programmes on Leadership, Sales and Advanced Communications.
To find out more about us or our programme and what makes us so very different as trainer and coaches, send an email to andreas.dorn AT gmail.com or contact us at +6012 287 5048.